It all started when our overrated adventurer, The Flying Lotus, woke up in a magical cornfield. It was the first time it had happened. Feeling less than satisfied, the Flying Lotus slapped a gerbil, thinking it would make him feel better (but as usual, it didn't). A few unsatisfying minutes later, he realized that his beloved invisible cloak was missing! He immediately called his red-haired stepdaughter a "friend", Lady Wonder. The Flying Lotus had known Lady Wonder for (give or take) half a million years, most of which were sassy. Lady Wonder was unique. She was attractive if a little... stupid at times. The Flying Lotus called her anyway, because the situation was urgent. Lady Wonder went to get the Flying Lotus very happy. Lady Wonder calmly assured him that most legless cubs burp before mating, but venomous koalas usually sneeze explosively *after* mating. He had no idea what it meant; he was only concerned with distracting The Flying Lotus. Why was Lady Wonder trying to distract The Flying Lotus? Because she had escaped from the Flying Lotus with the invisible cloak only eleven days ago. It was a curious little invisible cloak... how could he resist? It didn't take long before The Flying Lotus returned to the topic at hand: his invisible cloak. Lady Wonder shivered. Reluctantly, Lady Wonder invited him, assuring him that they would find the invisible cloak. The Flying Lotus grabbed his canoe and immediately landed. After hanging up the phone, Lady Wonder realized she was in trouble. He had to find a place to hide the invisible cloak and he had to do it recklessly. He calculated that if the Flying Lotus had taken the broken-down, diaper-filled sedan, it would have had to take at least two mi...... half the paper... would have collapsed. The last thing he saw before losing consciousness was a buzzing horde of Eagles running away with his invisible cloak. But then God descended with His accommodating smile and restored the invisible cloak of the Flying Lotus. Feeling angry, God struck the Eagles for their injustice. Then he climbed into his best-in-his-so-called "class" sedan and zoomed away with the fortitude of half a million legless puppies running away from a huge herd of three-legged wallabies. The Flying Lotus jumped with joy when he saw it. His invisible cloak was safe. It was a good thing, too, because in five minutes his favorite TV show, Jersey Shore, would be on (immediately followed by "When Man-Eating Capybaras Meet Ebola"). The Flying Lotus was stunned. And so, everyone except Lady Wonder and a few long-haired sea monkeys armed with contraceptives lived blissfully happy, forever...